autumnto_ashes

newnewnewnewnew

Mon, 09 Oct 2006 22:58:42 GMT

woo!

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 08:06:08 GMT

woo hoo for getting tattooed soon. hopefully im not a complete pussy. come one cody don't embarras yourself.

LOL@ ME GETTING OWNED

Sun, 19 Feb 2006 02:05:33 GMT

dad: we need to have a talk

cody: ok giv'r.

dad: you are a loser, a burden on this household, and you have nothing to offer anyone.

cody: its nice we can open up to eachother about things huh

dad: is that sarcastic?

cody: you're a fucking idiot.

i love it when my dad ownes me out of nowhere.

181818181881818

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 17:15:11 GMT

18th i go to edmonton for 2 weeks

see you all in hell suckers. or alteast at the end of the month

miss ya'll.

tagtagtagtag.

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 02:47:47 GMT

1. Thank the person that tagged you.
2. List 5 random/strange/weird things about you.
3. Tag 5 other people -

Thank you robyn for the lovely tag

1. i cannot grow sideburns
2. i have a new found love for rap thanks to jared
3. i have a hairless and smooth ass :)
4. i cry like a baby during certain movies
5. im afraid of telephones.

aftertheromance
toxic__candy
dontmovesoslow
loverod
mandrigyn

consider yourselves tagged bitches <3

bad times

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 09:19:49 GMT

So the party was definatly "bad times" as carley so eliquently put it.
A complete and utter bust in my opinion but it was still nice to see alot of the faces i saw.
I was still feeling hungover from the night before at carley's where i made love to her
toilet for about 4 hours and then came home at like 8am and was still hammered.
Apparently janna figured it was funny to keep feeding me drinks. And i have also
been dubbed "frenchie" for reasons unknown to me. I guess its better then chedder or
milhouse like others have called me before. I really need to focus on getting a job or i
am gonna get shipped back to the coast which, would be nice to see the family more, but i can't handle the size of it. and with all my friends moved here i am pretty sure i would just go insane.
Musically things are pretty good i guess. haven't played much with alex lately which has
sucked but we are gonna record soon which will make things better. i made a purevolume
of some of my stuff cause i was bored. i guess thats all the update i really have. sad though
cause i haven't been on here in a long time and apparently i am doing nothing with my life.

Thu, 22 Dec 2005 20:58:43 GMT

so i got completely trashed lastnight,
alone.

couldn't fall asleep till about 6am. woke up to the fact that i am now officially alone here till after christmas. Good thing there is a big bottle of booze next to my computer with my name on it.

fuck you christmas
fuck you coast
fuck you cody ... get a life

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 20:27:23 GMT

if you actually think i am gonna let it slide that you accused me of that,

think again

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 22:25:34 GMT

i don't feel welcome here anymore.

i was bored. gimme a break.

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 21:46:53 GMT

I don't really know why i am doing this, i think i just wanna see what i actually seem like down in words so bare with me if it sounds dumb or, you know, don't read this.

I was born in Canmore Alberta. I was my parents second child next to my older sister. Later my younger brother was born. I moved from Alberta when i was 5 and i moved to Keats Island on the sunshine coast where my dad worked as a caretaker for the camp there. I only attended Kindergarten at langdale elementary for about 3 months and was forced to stop because i was getting beaten up regularly at the bus stop. I went back in grade one and attended till grade 7. In that time i still had never had a gf or anything of that sort. I had crushes but nothing was reciprocated. I moved to Langdale about halfway through elementary school.

When i first went to grade 8 i was quite the jock. I had played sports since i was 6 and i was pretty much found in the gym every lunch playing basketball or something along those lines. That started to change throughout grade 9 and by grade 10 i was a skateboarder. I still played most of the sports. I had my first girlfriend in grade 10 which was awkward cause i was really shy. I don't even think we kissed once. I also drank and smoked pot for the first time in grade 10. By the time i was in grade 11 i started looking pretty emo with black hair and that sort of thing. Which eventually turned more scene. By the end of grade 10 i was quite the scenester fuck although i never really thought i had the scenester mentality.

I was never really that good at school, especially math and really anything that took alot of thinking or remembering because when it came to tests and quizzes i would think i know all the answers and then i would bomb them. I squeeked by grade 12 and did well in the classes that i took but none of them were really that intelligent of a class. My parents started easing up on me about my grades in grade 12 but in grade 10 and 11 they were pretty rough on me even when i tried as hard as i could.

I stopped playing baseball in grade 11 but i kept playing soccer till then end of grade 12 and now i am out my age group and would have to play with older men and i would get tossed around cause i am tiny.

im sorta bored with this so i am just gonna name off my injuries and some other random stuff so you don't have to sit through too much more.

- approx 6 concusions from being a crazy kid and sports
- 3 bruised ribs and a bruised heart from baseball
- 1 cracked kneecap from being a crazy kid
- I have been hit by a car twice
- Had the doctors tell me there was a chance of or i could have died twice
- 3 surgeries on my foot from baseball

- I am a very shy person especially around girls....still
- I get annoyed when people call me gay even when they are joking cause its so stupid and annoying
- I am afraid of relationships and if i say i love you, you can definatly count on the fact i honestly do.
- people can tell me anything without fear of being judged, although if its something i don't agree with i will tell you.
- im very afraid of confrontation
- If i have my music and nothing else i can be happy
- I hate it when people whine about how terrible their lives are cause they have to go to a job they don't like or something small and stupid like that.

this is all i can think of right now so i am sorry if you actually read all of that.

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 09:39:35 GMT

i might as well update this sonofabitch since its been quite a while. Not alot is new really though. Rockin my classic shitty teenage job, trying to pay rent. All that great stuff young teenagers not living at home are forced to deal with. I hung out with my mother, sister, and brother today and went to my little cousins baptism which was hella boring but alright after cause there was tonnes of free food and beer.

Christmas is coming up and the stress of it has already started to hit me. I think christmas puts too much stress on people. I would be perfectly happy not getting anything if it means that i wouldn't have to go through the stress of spending trying to find what they would want and worrying about if i spent enough compared to what they spent on me. I just don't like it when people spend money on me cause my tastes change so quickly most times its usually a waste of money and effort.

anyways thats all for now cause i don't have the patience for this right now.

Sun, 23 Oct 2005 09:35:14 GMT

too add to tongiht.... jared and garret tried to rip off my pants/boxers for some girls on webcam.......damn you all

Sun, 23 Oct 2005 08:33:18 GMT

so today was good for some things.....while everyone wasted money on the ghost train, garett and i got drunk down by the water (cuuuuuuuuuuute)..... but yah.....then i found out pretty much everyone thinks i am gay..... god damnit...... i don't even know why.....i don't look that gay do i?

anywhoo....some crazy guy slapped another guy on the bus and we got held up for like a fuckin hour.

bus left without lovisa

and pretty much everything else is same old same old.

men love me.

Fri, 14 Oct 2005 08:06:40 GMT

coheed was amazing.....the show was very good except for mewithoutyou.....i'm not much of a fan....i was impressed with the sound for sure.

other then that....things are good except i need a mofucking job.

Thu, 06 Oct 2005 23:48:32 GMT

My life is one big gong show.

coast life till the end of the week.

15 for 15.....no perticular order

Thu, 06 Oct 2005 00:26:10 GMT

1. I really missed out on those first couple years of highschool i didn't hang out with you, because if now is anything like it would have been then, then we missed out on way too much. We are kind of divided now but strickly by distance. We still think the exact same and i don't think that will change anytime soon i am very grateful of that. After all, "we are pigs and we love it"

2. I consider us best friends, even though i know how deeply i have hurt you. Sometimes i don't agree with somethings you do, and some things you say to me, but i am not very good at taking jokes sometimes. But after all of that, there is nobody that could take your place. Your always going to be close to me no matter what happens in the future.

3. We don't hang out as much as i like, but come to think of it we never have hung out that much. When we do i always enjoy it though because you are such a joy to be around. You may be kinda small, but you make up for it tenfold in personality. again, distance is somewhat of a factor with us but the time that we spend together always makes me smile and remember why i like hanging out with you so much. Besides that you are so beautiful and i am sorry for not making it clear to you sometimes.

4. We became friends because we had mutual friends. You are starting to drift farther away now and you don't act as much like the person i initially became friends with but everyone changes. I don't really agree with some of your recent activities but i am nobodys parent. If you ask for help, i will help. If not, you're on your own.

5. You maybe small and crazy, but your age never really changed anything about our friendship. We started with mutual friends as most do and sometimes i still feel like that but other times i feel like we are tight. Too bad your moving away in a few weeks. I sure hope it doesn't change anything too severely.

6. At one point in my life i loved you. This was not reciprocated and for a while our friendship was non-existant. Against the indeals of some of my best friends, i have warmed back up to you as a friend which is a good thing for sure, although sometimes you confuse me a great deal. I guess thats just how we will always be.

7. I don't know wheather it was timing or just a difference of ideas, but i fear i might have come on too strong to you. We don't hang out as much as i would like but you are a very popular person which makes finding time difficult. I am very sorry if i ever made you uncomfortable.

8. You remind me of the reason i am so afraid of relationships and confrontation.

9. I think your voice is amazing and the fact that it comes from such a young lady makes me believe that you have huge promise and that you will go far with any of your musical endeavors. Wheather with me or not, although i would love to play with you anytime you want. I feel we mesh very well and have potential for something more then what we have right now.

10. I feel as though i dissapointed you somehow when we met. Even though it was only for a few minutes we had talked for sooo long before. Sometimes people should believe me when i say i am nothing special i suppose. Takes away from the dissapoinment i think.

11. You are constanly thinking i hate you when that is never the case. I do think that we don't have much in common and somethings you have done make it harder for me to hang out with you. But by no means do i, or have i ever hated you.

12. Some things you say/do make me uncomfortable even though we used to be so tight. I try and let you know when you do these things but most of the time you don't really understand me. I feel i have done you a favor but i don't feel like i would ever need a thank you for it. It was purely by chance.

13. I consider you my friend even though you have done/said things to me that were non of you business. I see now that you were right about some of them. When we hang out we usually have a good laugh but sometimes i fear the honesty that comes after the alcahol.

14. We can go for weeks without saying a word to eachother and if we meet up somewhere by accident it is never awkward. I think that is mostly because of you because you are so outgoing it makes up for some of my boringness and quiet personality.

15. Working with you was a great time even though we didn't hang out much outside of the workplace for very long. not too much to say about that. Your just awesome.

wow....i didn't realize it would be hard to think of 15 ppl that had impacted me in a way that i would remember....but it was.....either way.....read away suckers.

Wed, 05 Oct 2005 23:27:35 GMT

live journal bashing is for fgts.

your just proving that you need to grow up.

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 02:53:59 GMT

i'm in a really bad/bitter mood.

fuck y'all.
all y'all.

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 18:32:50 GMT

i need a job so bad. i hate it how everything revolves so much around money. i also hate it when my friend has stupid entries about how he wants to kill himself. life isn't that fucking difficult. suck it up.

Fri, 12 Aug 2005 05:53:24 GMT

well back to small entries i think....they were best....everythings good.....car struck me....things are still good...luckily

vancouver home

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 08:09:25 GMT

well operation "move to vancouver" went off without a hitch i suppose. Switching rooms was one bitch of a job though. seems like it took forever but it was just constant laughter between my whining and garrets rant about my curtain. I have to start work this week probably. I don't worry too much about that though. I am also scheduled to hang out with robyn sometime too which is pretty cool. We make an awesome pool-playing,ass-kicking team but its mostly just her who rocks. I just realized a few days ago how long i have actually been single and i pretty much just laughed at myself. Close to 2 years. Am i really that much of a loser? jeeze louise. this whole "you'll find someone one day that will be so good for you" bullshit that people spew out all the time has pretty much lost the meaning it once had. Now it is simply an excuse. Even now i actually have a crush on someone, but i don't think it will make much of a difference. I dunno. It sucks but whatcha gonna do? Not a heck of a lot, thats for sure. I guess i am just a big try hard.

Tue, 21 Jun 2005 06:19:58 GMT

i haven't wrote in this motherfucker for soo long...basically i am done highschool forever (fuck yah) and i am moving to vancouver in a week and a half....everything was going by so fast and then i got a call today that one of my parents/my friends from a long time ago was in an accident and was killed....kinda slowed me down a notch .... can't let it get yah down tho...move on and such..i have decided i am not walking down with anyone for my grad cause i am a loser like that so i guess its lone ranger style....maybe i will just buy a blow up doll from the porn store and walk down with her....now thats classy... a huge congrats to everyone in my grad class and i hope you all succeed doing whatever you love doing and perhaps i will see you all again sometime in the future.

<3 james cody hilstad

Sun, 13 Mar 2005 03:55:30 GMT

"Hey, Cody, you are a loser... I didnt even do much to get Cassandra hahahahaha... we just love eachother to pieces, and you know what, if you lived closer and you werent sooo ugly, you think Cassandra would love you in a second wouldnt yah? NO, cuz ur a bitch."

courtesy of Harry.

its nice to know i am truly loved haha

Fri, 11 Mar 2005 03:27:12 GMT

You scored as Punk/emo. You are Punk/emo. Kick on those Converse and grab your guitar. Rock on!!!!

</td>

Punk/emo

69%

Goth

44%

Jock/Cheerleader

38%

Poser

31%

Slut

31%

Prep

13%

Whats your label?
created with QuizFarm.com

sweet jesus i am one hardcore mutha fucker *rolls eyes*

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 22:33:16 GMT

everything is fine...i am bored...mmm food